Tranquility before the storm

Originally, I promised myself that I must write something after I finished writing the project proposal. However, upon finishing the proposal, I went to lunch with Kelvin, Rosinni, Byron, then waited at McGill CAPS for an hour while reading Steevy's Blog about Godel, Escher, Bach.

When I got back to the office it was after 3:30 pm already so I began reading 明報 and 中時, while at the same time trying to solve some combinatoric questions. While the math part was at least entertaining, I realized that reading those two newspapers have become my one single worst addiction in the past......maybe 4 years!!! It has become a ritual that everyday after 3:30, whenever I am connected, I will incontrolably type the 'word' into the Firefox and click 'Enter', and waste another hour browsing. 苦啊, 苦啊, 誰能救我脫離這取死的身體呢? Those who are Chrisitians and know the Bible well enough should understand what I mean.

Speaking of the Bible, I just stumbled upon an article from the washingpost today. It basically talks about a bible scholar who became an agnostic when he found many contradictions in the Bible. Well, there is not a question that I haven't asked myself before. I thought about posting on the Galilee board, unfortunately the board seems to be in perpetual maintenance under the current leadership and NOBODY, absolutely NOBODY, seems to post anymore. Although, yea, one could've said, "Why don't you post something then?", but I have already left and, when your posts are ignored, I would rather just post on my own blog. The ignorance of the mass always leads to stagnance and worse......just indifference.

Well, I've said it! But I still hope that Galilee can flourish, and mend the gap between the elderly and the newcomers. Too bad the Great Ephesus Fellowship doesn't have one and I can foresee that probably it will take a long time and given the lesson that I learn from Galilee, maybe none is better after all :)

Anyway, back to the article from the post. I guess the Dr. Ehrman, although describing himself as a 'happily agnostic', must be a lonely man. To be honest, some of the christians have (and they should too) ask this question: Is Christ real? Well, I guess many just decide to ignore it or answer it superficially (again the ignorance of the mass) because doing an honest retrospection and give an alternative answer would simply alienate you and the self that you know, that you're familiar with.

Recently, I talked with a person whom I truly respect who absolutely inspired me when I was young, and I was saddened to know that he thinks religion just doesn't work for him anymore. Yet, it is admirable that at least he asked this question. Most just say, "What the heck, I will just be what I want and occasionally be a christian to satisfy myself".

True though, once you know more, you become more and more disillusioned. Other than being bored out of death by Laviticus and eventually decided to skim through it, it takes some time to reconcile the Lord who flooded the Egyptian and crushed the Canaanites like ants as the same Father in Heaven who so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son....

At the end of the day, I conclude that, it all comes down to personal experience. Have you experienced God's presence? Are you sure that He has helped you and taken you through your tumultuous time? If so, then now am I ready to declare that my past is only a construction of human irrationality and illusion? Am I truly a product of mere probability rather than a creation?

Maybe our past and experience are irrational and subjective, but I've found, at the end of the day, and it is the only thing that carries us through the turmoil. Maybe it is what faith is all about.

Btw, after trying out the "sandwich place in the corner" behind McGill bookstore, I can still confidently say that Thompson House restaurant remains the most economic place that serves decent food around McGill. Any objection???